Saturday, December 5, 2009


I find myself watching this 3 second clip over and over. Maybe because I can hear Jack's voice and he is using a word in the right context, maybe it's because he has goofy socks on and no shirt, or maybe it's because he almost hits Murphy as he swings the baseball bat around. Maybe because the baseball set was a gift from his Grandma or maybe because the summer sun is shining down. Maybe it's because this video shows Jack being a child, doing what kids do and not having a care in the world. Maybe it's because when this video was taken, we had no idea how our lives were going to change and the video is truly as innocent as it seems. After playing, we probably went inside, had dinner, had baths, read a story and tucked Jack into bed as always with the promise of a new day pending. Maybe I watch it because I want to go back to that place, a time where one of life's hardest lessons hadn't been taught yet. I feel that I am a better person because of the lesson taught but I wasn't so bad before it either. Had someone told me this summer that I only had so many days left with Jack, I never would have believed it. When I watch this video, the tears fall and all I want to do is grab him out of the screen and smother him with kisses, hear his laughter in my ear and feel him push his way out of my arms because he is a boy and has many more things to do other than be loved on by his mom. There are balls to hit, yuckies to find in the backyard and dogs to harass after all!


Jen and Shawn Day said...

Oh Cage- What we wouldn't all do to give him back to you... I'm so glad you have videos like these to keep his laughter close by. Lessons, shmessons... You were the perfect mother and never squandered a moment with your beautiful boy. I love you!

The Lunoff Adventures said...

I watched it at least 5 times and each time I laughed a little and cried a little. The want for him to be back in your arms, we all wish for. Hugs!!

angela.emitchell said...

ALL MY HUGS TO YOU!!! (((K))))

Briana and George said...

As I played the video clip, Luke came running up to me with a big smile on his face as he watched Jack hit the "ba". He asked to see it "den" (again) about 6 times, and cried when I turned it off to write this comment. Looks like you aren't the only one who loves this video clip ;) Sending you a big hug, my friend.