He is never far...

Jack Turpin Blood Drive-a-rama!

Our Jack Turpin Blood Drive-a-rama was a success!

What a perfect thing to do on the anniversary of losing J-Boogie...we saw so many friends and family, were able to unite with all the people we love to save lives, and introduced many people to the joy of "Hey Cupcake!" who generously donated cupcakes to all the people participating in the blood drive. We were so thrilled to have such support from everyone and seeing so many friends and family on a day that could have been sad was fantastic. Not only did people donate blood with us in Austin but friends and family who live in other cities donated (Dan and his brother ironically donated at the exact same time without knowing it) and people contacted us to let us know special things they did if they weren't able to donate blood...my cousin made cupcakes for her and her co-workers, my aunt made cupcakes for a family in their neighborhood who has a sick child, my friend sent "T3 and T2" shirts/onesies for the girls to wear and several friends purchased "Cracker Jacks" for me to give out with a thank you note to those who donated. Some people were first time donors and put aside their nerves to support us and celebrate Jack, a huge thank you to those of you...you know who you are (CT, LR, BV!!!)

When it was all said and done, we had 42 people attempt to donate and the Blood Bank was able to get 33 donations which far exceeded the original goal. The Blood Bank was ecstatic with the turnout and the success of the event. One of the staff in the van told my sister, "This is outstanding, I wasn't expecting to work so hard today." With 33 donations, we saved 66 lives. Awesome...

J-Boogie, your spirit continues to make the world a better place!

Jack Turpin Blood Drive-a-rama!

To celebrate Jack and his sweet life, we will be having a blood drive as previously posted about on September 24, 2010 in Manor! The blood mobile bus is coming to ShadowGlen! If you live here and would like to join us, please do so! Jack's favorite, "Hey Cupcake!" is donating cupcakes to everyone who donates blood. Our goal is to have 30 people donate. If you live outside of Texas, feel free to donate where you live to continue giving the gift of life.
To register here...go to www.inyourhands.org
Click on "Donate Blood," the bottom orange left-hand box. On the next page that opens, there will be tabs on the right-side. About half way down, there is another "Donate Blood" tab, click there. It will then say "Step 1," and there is a space to enter a sponsor code, type "Jackturpin" (all one word), that should get you to where you need to go.
A million thanks to my fabulously talented friend, Amy Barthel, for making such great posters that capture the spirit of Jack and this event perfectly and to Ken Smith for printing posters for us to distribute! You guys are the best!

"Pinwheels Pinwheels Spinning Around..."

To honor Jack on his birthday, friends brought us pinwheels to place on his bench. We went to the bench on Sunday morning and enjoyed Red Velvet Cupcakes and the ducks in the pond while placing pinwheels around his bench. It was really nice and felt like the perfect way to remember our Boogie. Thanks everyone who brought us pinwheels...so fun!

Happy Birthday Jack! (I want a John Deere!) & Monster Trucks

Well,

Happy 3rd Birthday J- Boogie, it is me your dad wishing you a Happy Birthday for everyone to see and hear!! I hope you had waffles and all the cupcakes you could eat! Today we celebrate you and all you gave to us! Cheers!

It has been almost a year and I have got a lot to celebrate, perhaps not how you thought someone who has not posted in a year might think. Today I celebrate my lovely wife Kristen, Krissy, Cage etc...Without her none of this would be possible. I cannot put it into words like she has. But without her this journey would not have been possible. She gave life to Jack three years ago today and still gives life to him today! She is amazing and I do not say it enough to her, but I think it is safe to say anyone who know us knows what I mean. You can't stop her...Her perseverence and strength hold me tight when I think those longing thoughts. Thank you Cage!

Today as I think back on all my happy memories of Jack, (too many to list, see blog!) I am reminded of several things. Most often things those much wiser than I have shared. I cannot help but think of my Dad's crazy toast at our wedding...he was talking about how we are all connected, somehow someway, (don't get me wrong I was kind of lost too when he started talking about photons and quarks and other strange matter that bonds us all together.) I didn't get it then, but I do now. It is so true. For example, last night when I was putting Kate to bed, I asked her to pick out a book for us to read. Guess what she picked out? "Monster Trucks," one of Jack's favorites and one we have not read more than once before. I could not help but think that Jack was there smiling down on us helping her pick that one!

Sometimes we have to stretch to keep our sanity and memories alive but then again you never know. Or like the times on Whidbey when Dean and Shagnaugh (sp) got married and two bald eagles flew over the aisle just before they walked down. I could not help thinking then that it was those we know watching down, or when we were finishing a Christmas beach walk and all of us had stoped at the end for wine and treats and a lone bald eagle circled around, (shortly after Norman of Norman and Patti's passing). There are many example for all of us, you know them and can feel them when you are around those you love.

Another quote I like from Tuesdays With Morrie : "So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half asleep even when they are busy doing things they think are important. This is because they are chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning" ~Morrie

So, tonight I am wearing my Elmo shirt (see photos from the celebration- Thanks Ken), sipping on a cold beer, eating a Hey CupCake! Red Velvet Cupcake and thinking about my son Jack and all of the joy he has given to me and the perspective I now have on what is truly important in life. Today I celebrate with all of our wonderful family and friends, those close and far who have helped us along the way. I am amazed daily at your compassion and generousity. No matter how small the gesture, they are all greatly appreciated and are helping us lay the foundation for a great future for our family.

I can't help but be reminded of one of may favorite memories of me and Jack. Shortly after his second birthday, we were at Home Depot, Kristen was busy looking at light fixtures. Jack and I went off and found the tractor section. As you can see in the picture above, Jack rode the tractor and I am on the other side on a John Deere next to him. We pretended we were racing! Here is to pretending and the road ahead!

Cheers J Boogie!

Dad

Happy Birthday Jack!

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Happy Birthday Sweet Jack!

Today Jack would have been 3 but as we know in this house, we don't think of the "What if's?" but the "Aren't we glad for what we had!" I can't believe that it has almost been a year without our Sweet Boogie. I am so proud of Dan and myself for surviving and surviving well. We haven't let this ruin us and we haven't let our spirits dampen. It has been a journey that we couldn't have traveled with just each other. To the countless people that have helped us along the way, we could never repay you enough. I will admit, it is still weird when people ask, "How many kids do you have?" How do you answer that? I tell them about Kate, about Baby T3 and say "We had a 2 year old who passed away in September BUT WE CELEBRATE HIM!" It is a true statement and avoids that awkward pause when the person doesn't know what to say. I can't blame them, I know the right words are hard to find sometimes. As I have mentioned before, even just acknowledging the loss or mentioning Jack to us makes us feel so good...it shows us that he lives on! I have a new friend that I met after Jack passed away and he told me the other day, "I feel like I know Jack." It made my heart swell.

It is almost a year later and I still have never been rolled up in a fetal position. I think of Jack and smile. I haven't been angry and I am still thrilled to have been his mom for 700 plus days. My brain still has a hard time grasping that what happened was one in a zillion, so rare it can't even be quantified. I have never let my mind go the place of "Why?" because I think that could tear us apart. I'll never have the answer so why waste the energy trying to guess at one? Let us be the one in a zillion so that we spare anyone else...we'll take one for the team for sure! I have stayed true to my belief that if I changed or allowed Jack's death to ruin me, what a double tragedy. I feel like I make Jack proud by how I have handled myself and what I didn't realize right away is that Jack will always be my son, that will never be taken away from me and that yes, losing your child changes you but that change doesn't need to be bad. I can't count the number of times I have listened to the song playing throughout the slideshow and agree that YES, "I love more, laugh more, take less time to make up my mind, go slower, love deeper, I know what I want and what I don't and I'll be better than I've ever been..." I am better than I was before and although I would do anything to have J-Boogie back, that isn't an option and being the best I can be is.

I put together this slideshow to pay tribute to my family: Dan, Jack, Kate and Baby T3. I wanted to show that despite this crazy year, we still laugh, we still celebrate, there is joy in our house and we haven't let this tragedy ruin us. For that, I am so proud. Thank you to Cindy Bullens for writing this amazing song after the death of her 11 year old daughter. It has pulled me into brighter lights and for that I am forever grateful.

Jack, I wish we were busy decorating for your party today and that Dad had your Superman Cape on you, ready to take you for your "Guys morning" of Waffle House and a trip to "Toys R US" to pick out a toy. I know that "Doddy" (as you would say) had such a great time with you last year while I decorated for your party and that it was a tradition in the making. For now, my mind will be at ease knowing that wherever you are has to be a wonderful place. I am sure your face is covered with cream cheese frosting from your Red Velvet Cupcakes and that you are surrounded by all those friends and family that have gone before us. Eat as many as you want! Enjoy your day and know that we love you and miss you but believe that we will be reunited again. In fact, maybe the joke is on us, we're still going to work, paying taxes, concerned about the oil spill and I think you're in a 5 star resort! We love you J-Boogie and continue to be so grateful for you...XOXO, Mom, Dad and Kate

P.S. If the video doesn't appear, hit refresh.

Mark your calendars!!!

I have been thinking about Jack's birthday and what we want to do to celebrate him. I thought the perfect idea was sometime around his birthday (which is close to the day we lost him) Dan and I would donate blood every year. I shared this idea with my friend who works at the Blood Bank and while he thought it was a good idea, he said we could take it a step further!

What is the grand idea you say??? On Friday, September 24th, we will be having a "Jack Turpin" blood drive! If you are a blood donor, please consider joining us or...if you live out of state and give blood, take time to donate in honor of Jack where you live. What better gift then to give life! We will have a mobile van that will be in honor of Jack that will be coming to Manor and all blood donors will receive a "Hey Cupcake!" cupcake after donating! (Of course!) I need 20 people for them to come out so if you would like to join us, please let me know! I really want this to be a success!

First Annual Jack Turpin Cupcake Eating Contest

It is tradition for a group of my college friends and family to get together every 4th of July. This year was no exception and it was also the scene of the "First Annual Jack Turpin Cupcake Eating Contest." My parents came up with the idea since Jack loved his Red Velvet Cupcakes. The "entry fee" was $20.00 and all proceeds are being matched by my friends work (Woo Hoo! Thanks!!!) and will be given to "For the Love of Christi" which is a free support group for grieving families and people in Austin. If you are a blog follower, you are familiar with this organization as they have provided immense support to me and Dan since losing Jack and I have sung their praises many times. Dan and I were so touched my parents did this and that everyone was so eager to participate. Jack lives on not only in our hearts but in other peoples!! How cool!!! (I think that one of the hardest things about losing a child is that you are afraid other people will forget them...please don't!)

We walked outside to find a poster of Jack hanging above the table where the eating was held and gorgeous looking Red Velvet cream-filled cupcakes. Leave it to my mother...she had to have been Martha Stewart in another life. We had groups of three that raced to eat the cupcake without hands (Kate was able to use hers!) as quickly as they could...I think the winning time was somewhere around 4 seconds or so...impressive! It was a fantastic idea and allowed for the perfect time, setting and activity to acknowledge Jack and to continue celebrating him.

For the Love of Christi costs about $600 per day to operate and we are thrilled that because of this event, a day of costs will be covered because of Jack Turpin and our wonderful friends and family!

Oh how my heart hurts...

I don't publish this post to make anyone feel sorry for me but oh, how my heart hurt when I saw this video. I am very familiar with all the photos and videos I have of Jack. When I was uploading some photos to the internet last night, I came across some old photos that Dan had uploaded off of his phone. Not expecting to see them and not knowing that some of them even existed was an unexpected trip down memory lane. I had tears flowing when I clicked on the first picture. The timing was probably pretty bad too since we were just coming back from a family vacation that he was at last year which made his absence so obvious. I clicked on this video and listened to him crying out/asking for me...oh Jack, how I do the same now. I have no recollection of this time and don't know why Dan would have been videotaping...I would like to think that I am off to Jack's right side as he seems to be looking that way and that I gave him a big hug right after Dan hit "off." Who knows?

Does Jack hear me cry out for him and feel sad too? Have our roles reversed? I spend so much time thinking about where Jack is, if he is anywhere and have figured out that I am pretty comfortable believing there is a heaven. I think all my loved ones that have already made the journey are with Jack and that the joke will be on us...we will arrive to heaven to meet all of our loved ones who went before us and realize they were living the high life while we were stuck in traffic, going to work, worrying if we were having a good hair day or not and if we'll have enough money for retirement. While I think about these things, (although I don't have to worry too much about a good or bad hair day, they are almost ALL BAD), I hope that Jack is waiting patiently, knowing we will be reunited and enjoying his time doing all the things he loved. Take a dip in the pool for me tonight and have an extra Red Velvet cupcake for me J-Boogie! I can't wait to see you again...

Rocket Club - One More Day - Official Video

So, my sweet little Jack is continuing to do things after he has passed that we haven't ever done...check out this video that Jack is "in." Love it. Should it be a surprise that the first time we watched it I could feel my own tears down my cheeks and Dan's hitting my arm as he stood behind me? Thanks Rocket Club for honoring Jack and asking us to use his photograph. Our pleasure!!!